I Will Wait For You

I read this for the first time this morning; I feel like it would be amazing to hear her recite this in person.

“So it seemed that it was cool, for everyone to be in a relationship but me. So I took matters into my own hands and ended up with him. Him who displayed the characteristics of a cheater, a liar, an abuser, and a thief. So why was I surprised when he broke into my heart? I called 911 but I was cardiac arrested for aiding and abetting, cause it was me who let him in, claiming we were “just friends.” It was already decided for me by the first date that even if he wasn’t, I was gonna make him “the one.” You know I was tired of being alone and I simply made up in my mind that it was about that time so I decided to drag him along for the ride cause I was always the bridesmaid and never the bride…

…See the bad thing is I knew he wasn’t you from the beginning. Cause in the beginning was the word and he didn’t even sound or shine like your Son. Out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks and all he could whisper were sweet, empty nothings. Which meant nothing. He couldn’t even pray when I needed him to. Asking him to fast would be absurd so forget about being cleansed and washed with water through the word…

…I will no longer date, socialize, or communicate with carbon copies of you to appease my boredom or to quench my thirsty desire for attention and short-lived compliments from “sorta-kindas.” You know he’s sorta-kinda right, but sorta-kinda wrong. His first name Luke, his last name Warm. I won’t settle for false companionship. I won’t lay in the embrace of his arms attempting to find some closeness, but never feeling so far apart cause I just wanna be held. Cause all I gotta do is say “No!” No more almost sessions of almost coming close, passing winks and buying drinks and “imma, imma, imma flirt.”

“I Will Wait For You” - Janette Ikz